Dear Emily Marie Fiona,
I have probably already told you this, but I think I need to tell you again. You have saved my life. That one day when I wanted to hurt myself, and you brought me orange soda and oreocakesters, changed me. It was a small thing, and didn't seem like much at the time, but looking back on it now, it was so important. I realize now that if you hadn't cared, I probably would have hurt myself, and it would have escalated, and all those stupid thoughts I have about doing stupid things, wouldn't be ignored, and I'm afraid to think about where I would be. You're beautiful, and going to be the most famous writer in the world someday. And I don't mean like J.K. Rowling famous, I mean like Charles Dickens famous. Because you're that good! and will only get better with time. (literally and in the Deep meaning.) You put up with me when most people decide its not worth it. You stick around despite the little things about me that I know drive you nuts. You're the best friend I could ask for. I love you. 
To Cambria Lauren,
You are fantastic. That's really all there is to it. You probably don't realize how wonderful you are, and I don't think I've been so happy to see an old friend in my life. You remind me that I'm good the way I am, that there is still a lot of good in the world. You might not be able to see it, but you're beautiful, and not just physically, but every part of you. You're strong, and deserve a lot better than you've got. And I truly believe that someday, you're going to get what you deserve. What that is I'm not sure. I really am hoping its some really awesome dude who will marry you and love you for always! You're smart and amazing, and love me no matter what I do. and I love you too. No matter what.
To Chandler Aird. (if I spelled your middle name wrong I apologize.)
You inspire me. You remind me that not all men are driven solely by what's below their belts. You teach me new things every day (even when I wish you wouldn't ;) ) and taught me how to see beautiful things. You brought me into a new world, that is filled with art, and love, and trust. I can be myself around you, and not care at all. You're the only male who can do that, I hope you know. If you notice the date and time of this blog this is directly after I asked you about Doug, and you reassured me I could do it. Thanks for believing in me. Thanks for caring. Thanks for showing up, and throwing me out of my comfort zone and into a place where I am strong, smart and happy. My life is good with you in it. 
To Nicole Hunter, It amazes me that we're as good of friends as we are. It seems impossible that we've lived next door for so long, and were such good friends when we were little, that we just forgot each other. I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry I didn't invite you over and let you fart on me sooner! You're human, and that's why I love you. If you can be human and normal, then so can I. If you can be so happy, then so can I. If you can survive, I had better do it with you. You gave me a reason to feel what I needed to and not pretend it wasn't there. You reminded me how AMAZING old movies are! We can learn to live from Audrey Hepburn. You make me smile, cry, yell, and laugh. You make me be a better me.
Dear Angela Meghan,
Here's the thing... I forgot for a while why we were so close, and I remember now. We are good together... (not just on tuesdays ;) ). You know what to say and how to listen. you know that all I need sometimes is someone to say "I've been there, and it's ok." you're one of the funniest people i know! not to mention the smartest. you know people, even when you hate them. You say you hate men, but here's the truth. someday, maybe not soon because high school boys suck, you're going to find a guy who's going to understand you, and never hurt you. you'll love him more than you can know. You're an amazing girl, and you have so much to give to people. Thanks for listening. I realize how small my circle of really close friends is. and I realize, that I don't actually care. I have four people who have changed who I am for the better, and I will always remember. Mostly because if we ever lose contact, I'll hunt you down a rip your toenails off one by one, while you hang upside down over a pit of sharks. (too dramatic? nah, not for us.) I have lots of amazing friends, who mean the world to me and then some. But you four, you're the reason I get by.
even though we're hittin' twenty! and we haven't yet matured! you know I think it's kinda funny! that we're all. a bunch. of. NERDS!
